Private Ponderings
by Darkflameangel
Summary: Hitsugaya had always wondered a few things about his Vicecaptain, but it didn’t mean that he liked her. If anyone questioned him on it, he was going to blame hormones. oneshot


Title: Private Ponderings

Fandom: Bleach

Rating: PG-13

Pairing: Hitsugaya/Matsumoto (sorta)

Word Count: 775

Summary: Hitsugaya had always wondered a few things about his Vice-captain, but it didn't mean that he liked her.

Disclaimer…don't own it.

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There were very few things in Soul Society that Hitsugaya Toushiro wondered about, and oddly enough, most of the ones that he did bother contemplating had to do with his Vice-captain.

This could be due to the fact that she spent 90 of her time sleeping on the couch in his office and still managed to spend the other 10 of her time partying with the other vice captains and that lazy ass Captain from the 8th. And yet she still got her paperwork done.

_Or_ it could be due to the fact that he spent all of his time conversing with her breasts rather than with her actual face. It wasn't that he purposely directed his orders to her cleavage; it was more like he didn't have any other option. Nobody could fault him for it; his eye level was right at her chest level after all. If he tried to keep eye contact with her his neck would be stuck in that position permanently. And walking about with a cricked neck was never dignified.

The things that he wondered about in regards to her really couldn't be faulted in light of his…uh, position. Other people had to wonder about it. They really did. It wasn't like his hormones were driving his train of thought. It was completely acceptable. Ok, so it wasn't completely acceptable, but if anyone called him on it he could blame his hormones, even though they were not the reason for it.

But, back to the pressing matters at hand. How did Matsumoto keep her breasts from falling out of her top? It was well known that she didn't wear anything underneath her uniform- a misplaced Zanpaktou swing by one of the recruits during training clarified that little matter- so it wasn't like she was holding them in with a piece of under-clothing. Could it be that she was using some obscure form of Kidou to keep them contained? Hitsugaya was positive that he knew every Kidou spell that existed, but could it be possible that he missed one?

That couldn't be it. Maybe she picked up something from the real world. That Orihime girl had to have something that she used. At least _she _wasn't a walking advertisement for a Shinigami strip bar. Hitsugaya knew he was young, but even he knew when a woman was stacked. He also could appreciate it, but that was completely irrelevant.

There was another matter that the 10th division captain wondered about. Ok, so it also concerned her breasts, but it wasn't like he was obsessed with them. They were just so shiny. She had to buff them every morning or something. There was no way that sort of shine on a persons skin was natural. Everyone one knew that Ikkaku shined his head every morning; the reflection off of his skull could create rainbows. It was possible that she borrowed some from him; he was one of her drinking partners after all. Maybe they shared shine tips over a cup of sake. That fruit Yumichika probably added his two cents as well.

He wondered if she sprayed her cleavage with perfume every morning, or did she have some sort of air freshener attached to the end of her necklace. Kami knows she had room to store a few things in her cleavage. Either way, she seemed to smell good. Not that he would notice of course. He was her captain and there was no reason for him to be sniffing her breasts. He just happened to have a very keen sense of smell and Matsumoto had the tendency to grab him unexpectedly and shove his face into her chest, that was all.

Speaking of storing things in her cleavage, not that he was speaking of such vulgar things. Thinking was another matter, but nobody needed to know that. Did she store bottles of sake in there? It seemed like she always had a bottle close at hand. Was her cleavage some sort of black hole for liquor? If he licked her breasts, would he come away with a buzz?...Wait, no…not going there. He most certainly didn't like his vice-captain in such a manner. It was hormones. Yes, just hormones. Completely biological. Nothing untoward about that.

Hitsugaya Toushiro most certainly did not have a thing for his vice captain. He also did not have a thing for her breasts. The fact that they were in his face every time she leaned over his desk to get a pen was the reason behind the speculation. Besides, Hitsugaya had always been more of a leg man and Matsumoto certainly did have a set of incredibly long legs.


End file.
